Terry Paul Choyce
December 9, 2007, Brunswick Street United Church
I am recovering from one of the longest and most painful bouts of illness I've ever had. For the last two weeks I've had to pretty much stop my life and just sleep, moan, and recover. I have tried my best to do all of the essential things I am responsible for, like church and my radio show. But tons of other stuff has had to slide. This is very hard for me, since I am driven to do things, and inwardly tormented when I don't fulfill my responsibilities. This has been two weeks of mostly letting go and trying to relax.
I think whenever our life takes a turn for the worse, we need to take the time to figure out the lesson or message behind this life detour. I've learned, or relearned lots of things. For one I have huge empathy for people who are chronically ill or in pain. The exhaustion, frustration, and irritability that come with feeling awful make our relationships strained, our jobs undoable, and put a squeeze on our finances. I just spent over $300 in medications, and I know many people don't have the ability to pay that kind of money, so they have to suffer even more. When pain goes on and on, beyond the reasonable time for healing, we begin to think we will never get better. It is hard to have hope for recovery.
It is so difficult to keep ones spirits up when the body is in pain. It is so hard to be pleasant to people when you just want to be left alone. It is so hard to do what needs to be done, when you just want to be in bed. I am normally annoyingly perky, and that's how I like to be. After 3 days of feeling yuck, I am a schmuck. I have little patience or tolerance. So I have to use my best acting skills and pretend that I'm still nice. I can act for about a week before the actress in me goes on strike. Then it is only the grace of God that prevents me from being shunned by everyone I know. Yet many people are pleasant day after day when they are in pain. I have huge admiration for them. They are saints.
When I get sick I always tell myself that it is a message from God, or at least from my subconscious, to slow down and be more peaceful. I am a fast-paced person. A meal that lasts more than 10 minutes is too long. Sitting still to take in the beauty of a sunset or a beach or the snow falling, lasts 10 minutes tops. I am a happy person, but I am not a peaceful person. I know this is a skill I have to learn, so occasionally my body has to force me to learn it. There is a real beauty in life when we can relax and be appreciative of the small blessings and beauty that is all around each of us. I know rushing through my life is the wrong way to be. I need the balance of action, and stillness.
So how does all this tie in with Advent? Well, last week was about hope, and this week's theme is peace. When we have difficult times in our lives it is essential to maintain hope. We must have faith that we will get better, or that we can at least gracefully adjust to our circumstances. We have to hope we can handle all obstacles that come our way.
Our reading from Luke today (8:40-54) was about two healings done by Jesus. A woman who had been bleeding for 12 years went up behind Jesus and just touched his cloak, and immediately her bleeding stopped. Jesus felt the healing power go out of him, so he asked who had touched him. She confessed, and he said to her "My daughter, your faith has made you well. Go in peace."
Obviously there was some kind of power transference from Jesus to this woman simply by her touching his robe. But Jesus said it was her faith that really cured her. And then with the healing of Jairus's daughter he said "Don't be afraid, only believe, and she will be well." She was dead when he got there, but he took her by the hand and she got up and began to eat. If her parents had not had faith in Jesus, would their daughter have been healed by his touch? Was Jesus the healer, or just the catalyst for healing?
Throughout history there have been millions of people who are not doctors, but who have healing abilities. I personally know a few people who are able to bring relief, and sometimes total health, just with their loving touch. Each of them attributes their ability to the healing power of God that flows through them. They say a person is healed by their faith that they can be healed, and by the grace of God which aids in their bodies becoming healthy. Every healer I know minimises their role, and tells people they have the real power inside them to be well. It takes faith, hope, patience, and inner peace to be truly healed.
And sometimes physical healing is just not possible. As we read two weeks ago in Ecclesiastes, there is a time for everything, including death. I presently have a dear friend, Arlene Brooks, who is dying of stomach cancer. She is in her 70's and is so appreciative for the wonderful life she has lived, and for all of the loving care she is now receiving from family and friends. She is dying with courage and grace. She is dying with inner peace. It is my wish that when my time comes, I too can face my end with such joy and gratitude for a life well-lived, and hope for the next adventure of my soul. Death is a new beginning. Our soul is released from a suffering body, and it can return to the pure love and peace of God.
Praise be the Lord
